Morning Rituals

Wake up, brew and sip coffee. It is finally Sunday, let the week come because it will make the time go faster. Let's immerse in work. It is only one last full week remaining before I go home. I want to see my dearest so much! Almost everything is prepared to set off. All the gifts and all the prep work. I am often thinking about when I will stroll to the forest with grandma in the evening.
I don' t feel like going anywhere really. Maybe the long not paid a visit to church. Definitely have to change the place as I have been in one for too long it seems.
Sometimes, to evoke once experienced emotions, I revive past memories of hugging others. Endorphins still give the memories such a vivid feel. Suchna cosy and comforting feeling. Wonder how long will I be able to live on just that.
It is a good time of the year to also evoke few moving pictures from the past such as Little Children and such.
Happy to be able to live independently and on my own for so long. Only thing I'd really fancy now is my watercolours set to create something. Getting back to the previous subject - it really is great to be able to do with yourmown time whatever you want. By this I mean that if I do not feel like going out anywhere although it's perfectly sunny outside I can stay indoors and be perfectly fine about it. Medley of different options  and the mere awareness of them add to the overall marvelous feeling.
Therapeutical function of writing a blog.

Will He Come?

Wszystko ogarniete, wyprane, posprzatane, ugotowane. Jakos zlecialo. Kolejny dzien. Czy chce zeby wiedzial? Nie o to chodzi. Chce byc fair, grac czysto.  Chodzi o uplywajacy czas do momentu w ktorym zobacze sie z najblizszymi.
Najwazniejsze to przetrwac czas przed @ teraz. On jest najbardziej wykanczajacy.
Lubie siebie, lubie to, co robie. Gotowe. Wszystko gotowe. Tylko przemyslenia niedokonczone wiecznie. Czy kiedykolwiek sie zmienie i nie bede popelniac niektorych bledow? Zwlaszcza w sferze zwiazkowej. Czy to juz czas myslec i przeinaczac sie na nowa relacje? Nowa osobe? Sami nieszczesliwi na widoku.
Uciekajaca wena za kazdym razem gdy zaczynasz pisac. Tabula rasa.

Saturday Morning Recollections

I don't need to do any grocery shopping. I don't need to do the laundry. It's Saturdsy morning and I am alome in my room. Nobody is going to visit me this weekend so I will spend it on my own.

I keep thinking about my hometown and the time I get there in a week's time. I am so excited, I have the ticket and some plans. This is no strict schedule though as I often gladly leave room for spontaneity and the room itself, time to be spent with my dearest kith and kin. I hope everything goes smoothly and the journey undisturbedly. Little things make me happy on the inside [as opposed to on the outside where it may not be explicitly visible]. These are e. g. the mere thought of the fields around the Sikornik area. The recollection of when we were strolling over there in the height of the sun. It was so scortching hot at that time. I was happy to have you nearby. We also sat for a short while on the bench in the adjacent area. It was so fine. Everything about that moment was so fine, I did not need anything more.

I believe I am growing fonder and fonder of Gdansk due to the fact that it was my decision to move up here. Contrary to Cracow alas.

Warm Shadow....

...is where I am right now. Mentally indulging, catering to my body with green smoothies, good food and physical exercise. Self-sufficient on many a level. Living on cloud ninne pretty much the whole time excluding some minor glitches. But then again who doesn't experience those. After all they only add the flavor so that you do not oversweeten your life - which, in turn, may be more ruining if there was no biterness present. Green tea has its share here too. Me likey.

I have been growing firm in the belief that I' m much like the SATC girl [no bragging intended] who wishes not to marry or comply with the standard version of a contemporary women's life scenario.
I can still remember the old early dsys when I began to settle down in this city. It was so alien to me. The only consolidation being the train station at a proxy. Now I feel I grew a part of this formerly unknown context, being able to movre around skillfully. I have never been a rest on laurels type. Although I may havbe not pondered over the futurictic plans for a while - not in great detail at least - it's beneficial to be surrounded by people who are constantly on the go, conjuring their close and distant futures. [It] gives you stamina to concoct your own [plans]. Oh yes, definitely. The competitibe advantage I possess,it seems to me, is that I, myself am more capable of distancing myself than those I observe.

Last year at this time the getaway with B commenced to unveil itself. Brought me lots of shivers then. Still experience some night visions re this fling. You came a long way, pilgrim, strolled and mused over the surrounding gammla Stadt.

Another one, K, wonder what he's up to these days. Whud ya got goin on? High nose, eyes closed, holdin on.

Still, am running around by myself. No need for company other than myself and a couple of strangers really. Wayfarying stranger[s]. One can create great things only when being oneself.

Nobember has come.

And soon will people be visiting them graveyards. Lighting candles, tidying up. It is and will so then be autumn and the leaves be falling. Hopefully, with no rain or dreary weather attached. Although I dont know if I'll be going home for All Saint's as yet, the memory of past events persists. Luckily enough, can I immerse in them on literally any occassion I wish to, regardless of the space and time.

Decisionz.

Miedzy mlotem a kowadlem. Nie wiem w jakim jezyku pisac by pozostac niedostrzezona przez wszelkie systemy detekcji raportujace w mojej korpo. Nie to zeby mi bylo tam zle. Wrecz przeciwnie. To kwestia przywykniecia do i wczesniej wyrobienia sobie pewnych nowych nawykow corpo bitch-like.
Juz od paru dni, o ile nie od tygodnia, mam ochote zwyczajnie zasiasc wieczorem przed ekranem i ogladac sex czy inne tego pokroju. Z kazdym dniem bedzie lepiej. Z kazdym nowym dniem bedzie mi przybywwc nowych praktyk i bede sobie lepiej radzic. To kwestia czasu. Dobrze, ze jest wystarczajaco wczesnie zeby nauczyc sie czegos nowego. Bedac zbyt starym trudniej jest przyznawwc sie i znosic porazki czy tez po prostu zaakceptowac fakt, ze uczenie to proces rozciagniety w czasie i nie dzieje sie natychmiast. Juz mam tego zaczatki,.ale.probuje z nimi sie scierac.

Travel.

To byly dwa sloneczne dni. Skalpel gral dwie plyty. Bylismy we dwoje i bylo podwojnie fajnie. Jego obecnosc, moja obecnosc. Moja praca, jego praca. Za krotko. Jednak nie odczuwalismy tego az tak dosadnie. Moze przez poczatkowe zachlysniecie sie etatami. Nowoscia. Innoscia. Jeszcze nie przeszkadzaja nam odleglosci dzielace (nas). Jeszcze nie doskwiera nuda. Nie dosiegnela rutyna zatrudnienia. Kiedy nastapi kryzys (praca)? Kiedy nastapi kryzys (zwazek)? Niech nie zmyli forma podanego przekazu; moze wcale nie nastapic.
Preferuje droge z jalowcowej na sikornik niz trase pl.piastow - agh. Nie chodzi o jakosc nawierzchni. Ludzie. To inna sprawa. Nie sa tacy najgorsi. Everything happens in yo mind. U may traverse w/o movin yo finger a single inch. U may transform yo attitude n so alternate the relations n environment round u. Btw. i am asked to write a lil something on the subject of mahself...