Haunted By Her Yesterdays.

Can't tell anybody. Can't tell thawt shit! She taught me to cope with it all, with the shit of the world all by myself. All on my own. To be strong, independent, harsh, not revealing any emotions. Nothing. Just cold inside and on the outter side. She used to say she;s protecting me from the real life. From its harshness. So that I can lead a carefree, undisturbed one. All that it was, a mere leading up the garden path. NO flaw can be revealed. No problem can be discussed on a critical way. None of the can be dealth with a speck of tolerance. You taught me all of this.I do not hold you responsible though. I just leave you when you yourself have something disturbing your perfect unspeckable reality. AND YOU THINK YOU ARE EXPERIENCED BY LIFE?! Let me do my thing, no reasons provided, no explanations included. LEAVE ME to pound into my things, to pound into what you call futile, what in your opinion can contribute to my imminent fall. The results of the life long competition are as follows: everything I owe you is that I blame you for all bad things happening to me. You are the reason , the ground why it all happens. BAck and forth, repeated all the time. Give me some air to breathe, gove me some spcae to operate! What I hold you responsible, however, is the commence of all my rebellions of all sorts imaginable, in consequence, inescapably of the use of all illegal substances possible as well. Don't ask me for more. Never ask me for explanations or reasoning. Your wretched fcukin hermeticity is gon' annihilate yer son'r later. I wish I had nothing to do with you. No bonds, no kith&kin, no acquaintances.